Mole Jokes!​

1. What did Avogadro give his ex-wife every month?  Alimoley

2. How did Avogadro help his team win the soccer playoffs?  He scored the winning Mole

3. What did Avogadro have on his pancakes? Molasses  

4. Which is one of Avogadro's best songs? "There's a Mole in my bucket, dear Liza, dear Liza."

5. On which American mountain was Avogadro's face carved in stone? Mount Rushmole

6. What did Avogadro invent for his wife to  use as a night cream? Oil of Molay

7. What song did Avogadro's family sing on New Year's Eve? "Mole Lang Syne" 

8. What was Avogadro's favorite drink?  Moleson Export Ale

9. Where did Avogadro send his CARE package? Moleasia   

10. Why did people say Avogadro was lazy?  They said he was as slow as Moleasses

11. Why was there only one Avogadro? When they made him, they broke the Moled.  

12. What is Avogadro's favorite chocolate bar? Molted milk  

13. What was Avogadro's favorite board game? Moleopoly 

14. What did Avogadro get when he mixed ice cream, chocolate syrup and milk?  A chocolate Molted 

15. What kept Avogadro in bed for two months? Moleonucleosis

16. Who was Avogadro's favorite singing group? The Moleing Stones

17. What kind of shellfish did Avogadro like to eat? Mole-uscs  

18. Who was Avogadro's favorite composer? Molezart

19. Which tooth did Avogadro have pulled?  One of his Molars 

20. Avogadro loved to watch M.A.S.H. Which character did he like most? Father Molecahy

21. What religion did Avogadro belong to? Molslem 

22. What did Avogadro's bird do when it was time for him to shed feathers? It Moleted 

23. What did Avogadro call his church services? Molar mass  

24. What was the mad bomber's favorite drink? Moletov cocktails 

25. How would you have described Avogadro's room while he was a teenager? A Molar mess

26. Where did Mrs. Avogadro do her shopping? In a shopping mole  

27. Which was Avogadro's favorite Indian  tribe? The Molehawks

28. What did Avogadro teach his students in math class? Moletiplication  

29. Which recent movie would Avogadro have really liked? "On Moleton Pond"

30. What are moles made of? Molecules   

31. Which team lost the World Series in 1982?  The Molewaukee Brewers

32. What did Avogadro think of hemorrhoids?  They're a pain in the mass. 

33. How did the young lady feel after walking through the football team's locker room? Molested

34. What did Avogadro put into the pockets of his tweed suit? Molth balls   

35. Can you name 2 movies that Avogadro really liked? "Mole Miner's Daughter" and "Moleby Dick"

36. What brand of cigarettes did Avogadro smoke? DuMolier 

37. What are mammoles?  Four-legged animoles

38. What was Avogadro's best day in golf? When he got a Mole-in-one  

39. What do you use to flatten hot asphalt?  A steam-Moler

40. How did Avogadro send a secret message with his walkie talkie?  He used the Molse Code

41. How did Avogadro get through the desert?  On a camole  

42. What is Avogadro's favorite kind of music? Rock & Mole

43. What do chemists do in a math class? Moletiply 

44. Which Walt Disney characters was Avogadro fond of? Mickey & Minnie Mole

45. Which part of the universe did Avogadro like to study? The Moleky Way 

46. What is Avogadro teaching his astronomy class about? The Molar system

47. What kind of fruit did Avogadro eat in the summer? Watermolens 

48. What do you get when you have a bunch of moles acting like idiots? A bunch of Moleasses

49.  How much money did Avogadro make being a chemist? Enough to make him into a Moleionnaire  

50. Where do moles stay when they're away  from home? Moletels  

51. What is Avogadro's favorite UH football  player? Jomole Farmer  

52. What does Avogadro use to call his  mother when away from home?  Molebile phone  

53. What did Avogadro say when he was surprised? Holey Moley  

54. What games do mole children play?  Ring Around the Moleberry Bush, Pin the Tail on the Mole, Mole Jeopardy,  Mole-ion Dollar Pyramid, Mole-opoly  

55. A mole in a wheelchair has a little  Mole-bility.  

56. What did the chemistry teacher say when she saw us all here at 6:02 a.m.?  

57. Holey Moley, there's a Mole-titude of  people here.  

58. What are school holidays for mole students? Mole Day, October 23 and Mole-oween  

59. Every 4 years mole athletes prepare for  what event? Mole-lympics.  

60. What kind of jokes do moles tell?  Mole-lock jokes  

61. What is mole's favorite water sport?  Water Molo  

62. What do mole teens do on Friday night?  Go to the mole-ing alley, watch Mole Train, watch Mole Jackson play baseball  

63. What do mole executives try to get on Sat. and Sun. afternoons?  A Mole-in-one

64. What are 2 locations on a mole globe?  North Mole and South Mole  

65. What line from Shakespeare do high  school moles have to memorize?  "To mole or not to mole this is the  question."  

66. What do male mole teens wear?  Designer jeans and molo shirts  

67. What animal are moles the most afraid of?  The mole-ar bear  

68. What kind of teeth do moles have?  Mole-ars  

69. What is a mole's most dreaded disease?  Mole-aria  

70. What kind of home does a mole live in?  A Mole-bile home  

71. How do teenage mole girls like to spend  their time? Talking on the mole-bile phone  

72. What kind of candy do moles like? Car-Moles  

73. Who is the mole's favorite rock group?  The Mole-ing Stones  

74. What element do moles love to study in chemistry? Molybdenum  

75. What do moles learn in math class? To Mole-tiply and divide  

76. What is a mole's favorite car racing sport? The DeMole-ition Derby  

77. What do moles keep in their scrap books? Mole-mentos  

78. What is the speed limit in a mole town?  35 Moles per hour  

79. What is a mole's favorite song? Heart and Mole  

80. What is a mole's favorite dance? Moles love to do the soft shrew dance  

81. What do moles call a very long period of time? A Mole-llenium  

82. What word describes a sad chemist?  Mol-ancholy  

83. What do you call chemical nonsense? Mole-arkey  

84. How would you describe a bungling chemist? Mole-adroit  

85. What word describes an evil chemist? Mole-evolent  

86. How would you describe a stinky chemist? Mole-odorous  

87. What sugar do moles prefer? Mole-tose  

88. What is an Irish chemist's favorite soup? Mole-igan stew  

89. Which mole is a playwright? Moliere  

90. Where can you find 6.02x1023 different things to buy? At the shopping mole  

91. Where do moles go for winter vacation? Mole-bile, Alabama  

92. Of which element is there always at least one mole present? Mole-lybdenum  

93. What company has produced 6.02x1023 Au and Pt records? Mole town  

94. Which mole likes fungus? a. mole A, b. Mole B, c. mole C, d. mole D?  d. Mole D (moldy, of course)  

95. Which mole sheds its skin? a. mole R, b. mole S, c. mole T, d. mole U? Mole T (the one that molts)  

96. Which mole has great liquidity? a. mole 6, b. mole 8, c. mole 9, d. mole 10?  Mole 10 (molten)  

97. Why does Avogadro like blue cheese? Because it's moledy  

98. What is Avogadro's favorite recreation? Molerskating  

99. What did Avogadro get when he got bit by 6.02x1023 mosquitoes? Molaria  

100. What do you call a 3-D image of Avogadro? A molographic image  

101. What kind of dog food did Avogadro's dog eat? Kimoles and Bits  

102. What was Avogadro's favorite saying? A mole in the hand is worth two in the bush  

103. What is Avogadro's favorite heavy metal group? Moletallica  

104. Why did Avogadro go to the dentist? To have is molar filled  

105. What happened to the sun on Avogadro's birthday? There was a molar eclipse  

106. How do you describe a chemistry class? A whole mole of fun  

107. Where did Avogadro get his gasoline? At the Molbil station  

108. What was Avogadro's favorite cartoon? Moletron  

109. What disease did Avogadro get? Pneumolia  

110. Where does Avogadro live? Mole-ine, IL  

111. What is a mole on a double date? 1.204x1024  

112. How did Avogadro sprain his ankle while taking a walk? He stepped in a mole hole.  

113. How do you reach a mole? Call Avogadro's number  

114. What is Avogadro's favorite breakfast? Oatmole  

115. What song did Avogadro's children sing? Here we go around the Molberry bush  

116. Who was Avogadro's favorite president? Millard Fill"mole"  

117. Who was Avogadro's favorite comedy team? Mole-arry and Curly  

118. What brand of cigarettes does Avogadro smoke? Camoles, Moleboro  

119. How does Avogadro make sure all atoms are present? He takes a mole call  

120. How much money did Avogadro have when he died? A molean dollars  

121. Who are sailors afraid of? Molby Dick  

122. What hairstyle did Avogadro have? A molehawk  

123. What kind of mole is found in 6.02? A decimole  

124. What does Avogadro do in golf? Shoot moles in one  

125. What did Avogadro say when he came up  with his theory? Holey Moley  

126. What is Avogadro's favorite song?  Life is just a mole of cherries  

127. What is Avogadro's favorite drink? Molk  

128. What does Billy Crystal say to Avogadro?  You look molevelous  

129. How long did Avogadro live? A Mole-ennium  

130. What is Avogadro's dream? To become an eskimole  

131. What does Avogadro drive? A molarcycle  

132. What kind of tests does Avogadro like?  Moletiple choice  

133. Why did Avogadro go to the skating rink?  To watch the molar derby  

134. What did Avogadro have on his neck?  A mole  

135. What do you call a rich chemist?  A moleyinier  

136. What religious service does Avogadro attend? Molar mass  

137. Why was Avogadro arrested? He was mole-esting people  

138. What happens to old moles? They turn into Mold (mole-d)  

139. What religion is most common between  Arab moles? Moleslum  

140. Why do they have national GroundHog Day instead of Mole Day?  Because a mole couldn't see his shadow anyway  

141. What do you call a stupid mole? Molon  

142. What person has the most famous mole?  Moledonna  

143. How did the mole make money for  college? Joined the molitary  

144. What does a mole go in on vacation?  A moleil home  

145. You know how people are always saying a  mole has poor vision? Well, it's bad as 6. 02x 1023/20  

146. What kind of lawnmowers do moles use?  A molcher  

147. How are wheat bread and chemistry  similar? They are both mole-some  

148. What do you call a mole at the mall?  A shopping mole  

149. What kind of berries do moles like?  Moleberries  

150. Where does Avogadro stay on a trip?  In a moletel  

151. If Avogadro cheated on his wife, what  would he be committing? Amoletry  

152. How often did Avogadro get his science  magazine? Every molenth  

153. What is Avogadro's favorite TV show?  Mole lightening  

154. What did Avogadro put on his blister to protect it? Moleskin  

155. Where is Avogadro's planet located?  In a molar system  

156. How many people did Avogadro's theory affect? Moletitudes  

157. What did Avogadro's pet snake do in shedding season? Molted  

158. What happens when Avogadro's kids brush their teeth in a hurry? Molar miss  

159. What is Avogadro's favorite chocolate bar?  Molecyway  

160. What state does Avogadro live in?  Molechussettes  

161. Knock, Knock - Who's there? Mole. Mole Who? Molecule  

162. What do you use to flatten hot asphalt?  A steam-moler  

163. What are mammoles?  Four-legged animoles  

164. How much money did Avogadro make  being a chemist? Enough to make him into a moleionnaire  

165. What did the mole do to the little hill?  He made a mountain out of it  

166. Which Atlanta Brave is every mole's  favorite? John SMOLtz  

167. What is Avogadro's favorite day of the week? Moleday  

168. What did Avogadro say when people told him there was no such thing as a mole?  You are full of Molearchy  

169. What is Avogadro's favorite element?  Molebdenum  

170. What made Avogadro interested in art?  He liked moleding things from clay  

171. Why does Avogadro get up at 6:02 each  morning? To run ten moles  

172. How did Avogadro feel after going into the  haunted house? Moletified  

173. What was Avogadro's second career choice? A Moletician  

174. What is one of the talents that Avogadro can be proud he has? He can walk and  chew gum simoletaneously  

175. What would you call only part of a mole?  A molecule 

176. What did Avogadro wear to the ball? Formole attire  

177. Who is Avogadro's dream woman?  Moleticia Addams  

178. What does Avogadro wear when it is cold?  Thermole underwear  

179. What kind of insect does Avogadro hate? Moles quitoes  

180. What disease did Avogadro have? Moletiple Sclerosis  

181. Where did Avogadro always want to go? Moleasia  

182. Why was Avogadro sent to the asylum? He wasn't normole  

183. Why did Avogadro go to the plant nursery? He needed molech for his garden  

184. What did Avogadro see when the volcano erupted? Mole-ton lava  

185. What Hawaiian Island did Avogadro vacation on? Mole-okai  

186. Who is Avogadro writing a history paper on? Mole-cam X  

187. What does Avogadro do in his spare time? He makes Mole-del air-planes  

188. Who is the most popular actress among the mole population? Moley Ringwald  

189. What is a mole's favorite television show? Molerose Place  

190. What did Avogadro find out when he went to the doctor? He had a moleignant tumor  

191. How did Avogadro do in the Science Fair? He received Honoramole Mention  

192. What does Avogadro eat for breakfast? A mole of cereal  

193. What did Avogadro say when he stubbed his toe? I want my molemy  

194. What is Avogadro's favorite sandwich? Moleogna and cheese  

195. What does Avogadro say when his friends want to go out with him? The mole the merrier  

196. What kind of make-up does the mole wear on his eyelashes? Molescara  

197. What sport does Avogadro enjoy? Moler blading  

198. What did the generous mole say when his friends crashed his party? The mole the merrier  

199. Where do moles go shopping? Park City Mole  

200. What genders are moles? Mole and Fe-mole 

201. What kind of test do student moles like best? Mole-tiple choice  

202. How do moles make broth? With a mole-ion cube  

203. How do German moles say Monday? Mole-tag  

204. What kind of wives do desperate moles have? Mole-order brides  

205. Why did Avogadro stop going to a chiropractor on October 24th?  Was only tense to the 23rd  

206. How did Avogadro deliver his packages overseas? Air mole  

207. What is a mole's favorite kind of music? A Moletown  

208. What's a mole's favorite candy bar? Three Molesketeers  

209. What did one mole say to the other? We make great chemistry together  

210. What's a mole's favorite U2 song? "She Moves In Molesterious Ways"  

211. What is one of Moledonna's first songs?  Moleterial Girl  

212. What is a mole's favorite movie? Mole Money  

213. What do moles do for fun? Moller skate  

214. What is a mole's favorite board game? Molenopoly  

215. Where are all these writers of these jokes from? Molesouri 

Last Updated: August 2023